True Happiness Happens Now

#truelove #allowing #dating

GPS for the Soul – The Huffington Post
True Happiness Happens Now
I started to uncover the secret to true happiness and inner peace, late one busy Sunday afternoon. I was working on a project with a Monday morning deadline when suddenly an inclination to check my email struck me. I have a standing ban on email and Internet surfing while working. However, faint echoes of a voice murmuring, “check your email,” triumphed, and triggered a breach in protocol. I discovered that Eckhart Tolle was leading a live meditation that day, which started three minutes prior.

Right away, my internal dialogue began working against me: “I don’t have time to meditate, I need to finish and I’m hungry…” Yet, something deep within me said, “Wake up.”

I put my work aside for the moment and clicked on the link to join the live meditation. I saw Eckhart silently looking at me from somewhere out there. In that moment I awakened to the Now. I felt like I could breathe again. By stopping my work and making the choice to participate in the live meditation, a pause in my thinking occurred long enough for me to observe that I’d lost touch with the present moment.

In this meditation, Tolle speaks about how the present moment has nothing to do with man-made time. Interestingly, time is exactly what my mind thought I didn’t have enough of.

Eckhart explains that the present moment doesn’t have anything do with the man-made sense of time, but rather, to be aware of the Now is the state of presence. He uses the analogy of furniture in the room as the thoughts in our minds. The essence of the room is not the furniture, it is the space in the room. Most people mistake the thoughts in their minds for who they are. The furniture comes and goes, as do the thoughts in our minds.

Eckhart goes on to say that presence is being aware of the deeper dimension in us, so that we do not delude ourselves into believing that we are the content of our minds.

Many of us spend our lives trying to eliminate our problems, but it is only in the imaginary future of our minds that our problems cease to exist. Tolle bursts that illusory bubble, by suggesting that life is rarely without struggles. He chuckles, and asks if this point of view could be perceived as pessimistic or negative. My ego would love to say, “yes, Eckhart, that is a negative point of view and as soon as I solve all my problems I’ll be just fine.” In truth, I used to believe that was true. I thought if could get my life “figured out,” then it would be smooth sailing. However, trying to solve all my so-called problems and fix things only left me exhausted and disappointed.

Here’s the shift… for us to actually be aware of awareness there needs to be a cessation of our thinking. For me, stillness lay within waiting for a moment when my continual stream of thinking would cease. On that Sunday, a choice to stop my work and watch a meditation was exactly what I needed to bring me back to self-awareness into the present moment. Eckhart’s words come from a deep presence, and sensing that presence in another reminded me of the deeper dimension within me. I have a feeling that we are all here to remind each other that true happiness and inner peace are within us Now.

Valentine’s Day: Another Look at Romance
Now I get it! I finally understand why Valentine’s Day has never felt like a romantic event to me but rather a symbol of compassion, love and family. Without even realizing it, my sentiment has its roots in the history of why we celebrate Valentine’s Day in the first place.

Historically, the celebration of Valentine’s Day began with St. Valentine, who was a Roman priest. He was tortured and imprisoned after being caught secretly performing marriage ceremonies for young soldiers. Apparently, soldiers were forbidden to marry because it was believed that single soldiers made better fighters as they had nothing to lose. The married soldiers on the other hand, tended to be more cautious in battle for fear of what would happen to their wives and children, if they were to die. They had a sense of commitment, compassion and concern for their family. The celebration of Valentine’s Day began with a belief in the importance of relationships and family.

2014-02-14-candyvalentine.png

When I reflect on Valentine’s Day, memories from childhood flood me. I remember going to the drugstore with my mother to select the box of colorful and cool valentine cards to share with friends. I would rush home and gentle lay them out on the carpet for examination. I would select the right message for certain friends and then careful choose the one that I would give to a special boy in the class. They would each be signed and candy taped to the envelopes. The cards would then be placed in a brown lunch bag and put into my back pack for delivery at school. You remember the drill. The excitement of the valentine party, the cookies, the sharing and receiving of fun cards from friends.

Then, upon arriving home from school, I would wait with great anticipation for a special dinner and my father to come home from work. I knew he would enter the house with a whistle announcing his arrival and his hands would be behind his back. As he made his way to the kitchen, he would gently place a red heart shaped candy filled box for each of us three girls and a big box for my mother on the counter. This would be followed by a special dinner and Valentine’s Day dessert.

It is not surprising to me when I am asked what I am doing for Valentine’s Day or what gifts my husband and me will share with each other, I am somewhat at a lost. It occurs to me that Valentine’s Day in my marriage has been about many of the same things as it was when I grew up — family. My husband will buy the girls flowers and candy today as he has every day since they were little girls and we will take time to reflect on each other. Okay, so maybe that is romantic. But not romantic in the typical flowers and candy way (although I do love the dark chocolate). Rather, romantic in the truest spirit of what makes a man attractive and desirable. For me, the top three most romantic and loving things about a man include:

1. A strong guy. Yes, like most of you women I do love the appearance and feel of solid muscles. But the bigger turn on, is a man who has a strength about him because he is kind and gentle at his core. A man who on Valentine’s Day remembers his children, his friends and the widowed woman at work with candy and treats to let them know that they are important. A man who can wish the servers in the restaurant a happy Valentine’s Day.

2. A man who can cook or at least try. Come on, ladies. You know that when a guy throws a towel over his shoulder and begins to chop something in the kitchen — he turns into a hot, sexy man. In our house, my husband really doesn’t know how to cook, but he certainly can wear that towel on his shoulder well.

3. A great listener. Research has been very clear that there are certain regions of the brain that are rich in dopamine (the feel good hormone) that light up when we feel connected and engaged to others.

Listening, really listening is the truest form of respect. The most romantic and loving thing about a man is often his ability to be fully present and engage in conversations. The man who at the end of a long work day can listen to endless stories from his children, wife or even mother-in-law. Really guys, if you pay attention and hang on our every word, we find you more attractive and desirable. It is win-win.

So, on this Valentine’s Day, find a way to honor the memory of St. Valentine and his commitment and belief in the union of loving each other. Make it a day to celebrate the power of connection and love with your family, your friends, your partner. Express your gratitude to those who have given you the gift of love.

Subliminal hypnosis: sports hypnosis, weight loss hypnosis, mental health hypnosis, and 40 different topics hypnosis at Amazon.com, full catalog    http://amzn.to/VGoe0Y photo 2163_zps044fb03b.jpg

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s